Wednesday, January 09, 2008

massage etiquette

there are so many different ways i am able to spell 'awkward' in my life. there simply isnt enough time in the day for me to write or for you to read all the creative ways i have found to experience the glorious and sickening heights of discomfort. there was the time i was getting a massage at a spa with mr. hands all over me to the point where every part of me thought i should say something, but i, drowning in my bone dry well of assertiveness, could not for the life of me muster any words. instead i endured rather than enjoyed the latter part of my massage and didnt tip as generously. i know some people who would have said something, quit the 'relaxing' experience, demanded a refund and spread a few rumors, but im not that girl. not that i dont want to be, its just that im not. i seem to possess zero assertiveness until im highly irritated and its then that i boldly skip assertive and head straight to raging biatch. how i wish it werent so, but thats actually not what this post is about...


rather, im wondering when you are getting a manicure or pedicure (as i was today) and hard working cosmetologist is actively massaging those hands and feet, what do you say? do you say nothing and not let her know this is actually the best part of the whole shabang or do you encourage with some degree of verbal feedback? i feel weird even maintaining eye contact and yet i dont want to appear disinterested or lackadaisical (after all the painted pigs and fingers are simply bonus to the relaxing rub down), but its just a bit awkward during those moments when a total stranger is working hard at making you feel good and all the things that you could say somehow within this encounter with a stranger all sound just a little bit inappropriate. so, let me know...how can i keep the best part of the service going without feeling totally weirded out? or worse, being the source of a discussion around a mat of kimchee during break...

8 comments:

Lynn said...

Okay, first, you need to call me next time you are heading out for such pampering. Seriously... that is one of my answers to your "what to do while they are working" question. If you have a friend there, you have someone to talk to so there is not that tension of "should I be having a conversation with this person?". Then, I usually give a smile or sign that I am excited when they get to the good parts. If I am by myself and getting a pedicure, I usually take a book. That way I have something to occupy my time in case I have someone that is not chatty. I see it in a similar light to sitting beside someone on an airplane. I am always willing to talk, but I have a book available so there is not that nervous silence if the other person is less interested in conversation. That way I can still look up and give a smile of appreciation but have somewhere to direct my gaze otherwise. In Korea I find that this is less of an issue because of the language barrier. Conversation is usually not an option. My, my, this has become quite long for a comment.....

katie said...

thanks, lynn, for your insight. when you get back from china and have taken the necessary week to unpack all your great buys, call me and we will go get our piggies done..and be sure to keep talking during the best parts...maybe even about how great it is!

Anonymous said...

Umm, that is my deal EVERYTIME I go to get "relaxing" treatment. I have vowed to NEVER get a massage again. I can't stand them and don't feel ashamed to admit it. Give me the cold hard cash it takes to pay for an hour of total uncomfortableness and I will find comfort elsewhere.

As for the mani/pedi...bring your favorite book/magazine or a friend. Let them do their job. I just give a good tip at the end. That speaks volumes. :)

Love from the big D, lisa

katie said...

thanks, lisa...after your asian nail experience, im amazed you have ever ventured back. you baby. :)

Jenna Stitzel said...

I just do a really loud orgasmic sigh! :) Just joking! That's what I WANT to do...but that wasn't what your question was right? I normally get eye contact early on and smile then during the rub down I say "kamsameda" and smile some more! :) I have NO idea if it gets me points for trying...but I like to think it does! I'm sure they just smile and think to themselves "I'm sure that's the only Korean this white girl knows!" And then maybe that just makes them mad and it really back fires! SO clearly, I have no idea and good luck with this! :)

katie said...

thanks, jenna...invaluable advice, really. :)

Anonymous said...

katie, i hope you are doing well...the peach is beautiful (the apple hasn't fallen far from the tree when it comes to her looks)! when getting a massage, mani, or pedi i make sure to let them know when they are doing something right and on the flip side are failing to do something correctly. since i have never been to s. korea, i can only speak of my experiences her in the us so here it goes...i tell them that my fav part of the mani/pedi is the massaging and politely ask them if they can spend more time focusing on that even if it means i walk out of the salon sans polish on the digits. regarding the massage, i say speak up sweetie pie you are paying someone to help you relax not to make you feel uncomfortable...chances are you are so tensed up about being uncomfortable you aren't getting the full benefits of the massage! love & miss you lots:)

katie said...

hey tammy,
cant wait for the day we finally get that pedi back in good old rapid city! how have you been??